Null and Void

I am shocked with what I have done to my life. I have drowned my innocence, stabbed my goodness and killed  my true self too soon. I do not know what I want, I do not have anything to give and I cannot foresee my future, not even dare to dream about it. I am too engulfed with pain; I wish those occasional outbursts of desire would stop too. I need to be nonchalant, I need to be numb. Do you hear me; yes you upstairs? Or will you pretend deafness as all else around me. This is a free-fall, into an abyss of non-existence. Hold me back, support me. Else, let me sleep again... and this time, forever.

Nemesis

Bound to the land with blood, I swim across continents to conquer. I fail. I fail and I drown my desires...in blood.
There was a day when the sun had parched my skin...red and black and blue. I hid behind the sky. You pulled me... with blood.
You sunk the crows, put them to sleep and woke me up. I fathomed the depths of belonging...gory depths.
Bowls of hunger have I devoured...the moon's tidings having endured. You held me tight around the waist and broke my neck...put my heart to rest.
Rotten flesh, stale blood and worms... you are satiated.
It's my turn now.